If you followed the recent special election that took place for Alamaba's vacant Senate seat, then you know it was anything but normal. And folks, that's because we are not living in normal times. Roy Moore, who has been banned from a local shopping mall for being predatory towards young girls, was running to fill that vacant seat in a campaign that captivated the nation. He pulled out a loaded gun on stage during the primary. He was accused of being a pedophile and he even rode a horse to the voting booth on election day. Moore displayed himself as a cheeky character who turned much of the country against him and made him look more like a cartoon than a candidate. So here is the curious case of Roy Moore, the horse loving, gun touting pedophille and his crazy campaign. 


Loaded Gun:

In normal times simply voicing your support for guns rights would be sufficient in swaying undecided voters, but these are not normal times, and instead of just saying so, Roy Moore pulled out his loaded gun while on stage in rebuke of an ad which claimed his disapproval of the 2nd amendment. 



We Love Jews:

Now, just link in the clip above, it's no longer enough to rebuke false claims or simply deny them, you must passionately and matter of factly show just how wrong your opposition is. Here we see Roy Moore's wife take the stage and proclaim that they don't hate Jewish people because you guessed it, they have a Jewish lawyer.  Warning: this video is cringy and basically the same cop-out as, 'I can't be racist, I have a black friend and he lets me say the n-word'.



The Bible:

As if things couldn’t get anymore cringe, a Roy Moore spokesperson stepped things up a notch when he visited CNN and talked to Jake Tapper about Muslims being unable to serve in Congress. The spokesperson believes that Muslim aren't able to serve in Congress because to do so you have to be sworn in on a Bible and for a Muslim that is unacceptable. The truth is that when you are elected into office, you can choose whatever book or religious doctrine you want to be sworn in on, not just a Bible. Watch as he grapples with the hard truth that he truly doesn't know all the facts.



Roy Moore's Horse:

Roy Moore made a point during his campaign to stand out. He wanted people to know he supported gun rights so what did he do? He pulled out his pistol. He also wanted people to know he wasn't anti-Semitic so what did he do? He had his wife talk about the Jewish person who protects them from lawsuits. And finally, Roy Moore wanted to show himself as just your regular old American cowboy and decided the best way to do that was by showing up to the voting booth on a horse. I wonder how many people in Alamaba actually own horses because maybe this tactic is better suited for Utah or Montana. Also if you're going to ride a horse make sure you know what your doing first Roy.



Like I said before, we are not living in normal times and Roy Moore knows this because even someone who is accused of being a pedophile, whether true or not, would be so ashamed of the allegations that they would step down, but not Roy. Roy Moore disappeared from the campaign trail days before the election and when he popped back up he was interviewed by a 12-year-old girl and during this press hearing, an old friend of his told a story about them going to an underage brothel during their service in Vietnam. He made a point that Roy Moore wanted to leave, but what he didn't say is that Moore and his friend left their fellow soldiers behind to sleep with fucking children. 


Roy Moore was adamant about his rebuttal of the egregious claims made against him but he didn't outwardly deny this claim in the same fashion. Now, why is that? Our best guess is that bringing a 15-year-old girl on stage and having her say, "I'd never sleep with a guy like this unless he forced himself on me", might not go over as well with his supporters as his other shenanigans did, but hey, that's just a thought.