NBA Fans Have a Plan to Fix the All-Star Game: Human Sacrifice

Time is a flat circle.

By Braden Bjella

Published 1 day ago in Wow


Time is a flat circle.


Talk to any NBA fan, and they’ll tell you that it’s a pretty desperate time for the league. Games just aren’t fun to watch anymore, and stunts like the recently-expanded All-Star Game have failed to reinvigorate the sport.


That’s why some NBA fans are looking to the past in search of ways to get the excitement up. One fan’s suggestion? Human sacrifice.



In a now-deleted post on r/NBA, Redditor ClubbersTheFoot harkens back to the days of the Mesoamerican ballgame by offering a suggestion that he says can make the league more exciting while also bringing the country together in a divided time.


Citing how good the All-Star Game was after Kobe Bryant died, our dear friend Clubbers humbly suggests that “every year, the NBA just needs to kill an iconic player that current NBA players idolized.”


“When Bill Russell died of natural causes, what did we get? Some memorials and some touching tributes, but that’s all,” recalls Clubbers. “The NBA could be doing so much more. Imagine if Bill’s death was built up over a month-long saga, where he and other icons of his era were selected in Bachelor-style contest to see who dies at the end. Think of like an All-Star Death Draft, but it’s picking which star gets to die tragically to save the 3-day long all star event. Think of the ticket sales!”


It’s a bold idea, and a lot of rules would need to be changed to accommodate it — but hey, why not?