"My guy, can you put down the tv remote and play with your controller we are trying to win here." - u/ddog0606

"Even Noah and his ark can't carry these animals." - u/HypersensitivePotato

"A lil kid who sounded like he was 10-11 roasted this older man after he was talking s--t by saying, 'Hey it’s like 1 o'clock, don't you have work or something? Don't you have a family to support??' The man was silent after that." - u/YugLee

"Playing Fortnite with my son and his friends. Son: My dad’s here, too.

Friend2: Is he any good?

Friend1: Yeah, but not as good as Cooper.

Me: What? How old is Cooper?

Friend1: He’s 9.

I’m 42 and been gaming since the 80s. Cooper showed up later. He is better than me." - u/McMcSpam

"Did you just get your damn goldfish and let it flop all over your controller or something?" - u/TheFinalStorm

"'You're the reason that I'm pro-choice.' LoL is fun." - u/KawlN

"I hope you're better at being a dad than you are at this game, old man." - u/thatotterisrabid

"Halo Infinite has it so that the enemies dynamically react to how the player is doing, and insults them accordingly. Nothing is more humiliating than trying to ram a squad in a warthog and missing because you clipped a tiny pebble weirdly, then having the Banished go 'We're safe! He can't drive!'" - u/felswinter

"I bet you forget the water and burn your ramen." - u/Abra8686

"Your teammate must be a garbage man because he's great at carrying trash." - u/Mr_Engineering

"I bet your bathroom floor smells like piss with the aim you have." - u/newaccountfor2022

"In iRacing, a racing simulator, after a guy crashed with him, one guy said: 'You're like Mr. Potato Head but you forgot to put your eyes on.'" - u/MrTrt

"I'd say your aim is cancer but cancer actually kills people." - u/Fyeire

"This guy came into the GTA V lobby bragging about how everyone in the lobby was broke, because they were playing on their PS4’s. He, however was playing on a PS5 he sounded like an older (40’s) guy. This kid turned on his mic and said 'How can you afford a PS5, but not your kids child support?'" - u/Pure-Point7744

"Not directly while playing but after I had spent a whole weekend non stop playing the most recent Pokemon I made a self deprecating joke about seeing a condom add on Facebook. Something to the effective of, 'Facebook must be broken. Clearly I don't need these.'

My friend responds immediately, like a rehearsed sitcom, 'Facebook just wants to know if you'd like to try an alternative form of birth control than playing Pokemon for 20 hours straight.'" - u/BecauseImBatmanFilms

"Tell me, what do crayons taste like?" - u/AFunkyRhythm

"If the child worker could see how bad you use the controller he made, he would throw himself out of the sweat shop." - u/Fernando_357

"Have fun watching HGTV with your wife, old man." - u/Bubbly-Brick

"I once told a guy being toxic on Rocket League that he played like he was the descendant of the Habsburgs." - u/The_Artemisian

"If Lee Harvey Oswald had aim like yours JFK would be alive." - u/newaccountfor2022

"My son is adopted. Once a kid told him 'Your parents don't even want you!' My son fired back, 'Dude, I'm adopted, my parents CHOSE me. Your parents got stuck with you.'" - u/HannahCinLV

"My mother is a pile of ashes and she's still wetter than any girl in your proximity." - u/Peng_Jia

"While playing League of Legends - 'You have the map awarenees of Christopher Columbus.'" - u/CanITurnTheHeatUpJo

"If I wanted to watch you f--king stand there and miss every one of your shots, I'd have taken you to the bar." - u/HeroesinHoodies

"I just beat your a-- so hard that you will need to change your pronouns to was/were." - u/legend_of_wiker