When I was a kid, I had a broken arm and they needed to inspect my cast… cut a piece off of it and put it in some sort of machine.Also, my dad and oldest brother’s names popped up on the do not fly list because of men with the same name being a part of the IRA. For years when ever my dad and oldest brother went to fly they had to bring all sorts of ID with them to prove that they aren’t the same dudes.

Glass jellyfishLike those blown glass ones that are super cool at art galleries.I got pulled aside into a small room because they thought I was smuggling sea life. Was an interesting time.

"Crotch anomaly". I was wearing normal joggers, nothing in my pockets. The lady behind me loudly said "yeah it's called a d**k"

My mom passed away unexpectedly in California. I flew out to pick up her ashes and there was a terror alert at LAX. It was unreal; the military was in the airport with what looked like machine guns. I was out of my mind with grief and drugged to the gills. I was dealing with a bad back, and had to fly from California to a small town in Virginia for the memorial service. Security was heightened and everyone was being searched. I only had a small carry-on and my mom’s ashes.

When I got to the TSA, the agent wanted me to open my mother’s box of ashes! I refused and insisted they x-ray the box instead. It showed nothing inside ( duh- ashes) which convinced the TSA agent that it had some sort of cloaking device and was hiding a bomb. Again he insisted that I open the box that held my mom’s ashes. I was beginning to lose my s**t. I called my husband who works in nuclear power and explained what was going on. He told me to tell the TSA agent to place a coin under the box and send it through the X-ray again. He did and thank goodness he saw the coin. Otherwise, I would have been arrested for assaulting a stupid TSA agent.

One time my dad had a few rocks of petrified wood in a bag, and had his phone charger right next to it.They almost went DEFCON 1 and did radio people to show up and act if it went down. But they opened the bag and saw it was rocks and a charger. They told him that it looked absolutely identical to what they had been taught a bomb looked like.

They thought my insulin pump was a bomb. I was tackled by TSA immediately. I was 14 at the time, still traumatized. Now any time I see any law enforcement I get anxious.

I had a nutcracker in my carry-on. Like a legit, festive Christmas soldier nutcracker - it was a gift for my mom's birthday (she collects them). I was only flying in for 2 days for my grandmas funeral so didn't check any luggage. They stopped me and questioned me for 30 minutes. Kept insinuating I was going to use it as a weapon.

Not in the USA but in France, I got stopped on the way through customs by an agent who said something fast and aggressive-sounding in French. My French isn't great, so I just looked puzzled and said I didn't understand. The guy quickly beckoned another guy over and explained to him in rapid-fire French what was going on. The second guy turned to me and said "He says your T-shirt is really cool and can you tell him where you got it?". It was a Star Wars T-shirt that I got as a birthday present, so I couldn't even tell him where it came from. Luckily, he didn't arrest me.

I have maintained a decent beard and have a darker skin complexion for a white dude. I am "randomly" selected for a search or shoe swab every single time I fly.

My niece has a teddy bear. She has had this teddy bear essentially since she was born. The doggo has bitten a hole into its belly, so we sew onto it like a lion head sticker, to keep its guts inside. One time we were on holiday visiting family, and she left it there, luckily I was staying a bit longer so I could grab it on my way back.An adult man with a teddy bear that had its guts torn open and fixed with a lion bandaid apparently looks pretty suspicious, so they shoved the poor guy into x-ray 3-4 times. She is still in ownership of the teddy bear and it is still in decent shape.

They searched me when I was 18 and flying alone and said it was because my ID was only a permit. When I went to my connection airport, I told a black TSA women "Do you need to pat me down again because i Have a permit like the last airport?" She looked at me and sighed "No honey. Thats not a thing".

My son was too tall for his age

I had a sample size (0.1oz) bottle of perfume in my book bag. They confiscated it in Detroit without explanation.I got to Germany and they discovered a full size pair of scissors in the front pocket of that same book bag. I wasn’t aware it was there. Both I, and American security, had missed the scissors.German security was much more polite over confiscating the scissors than American was over the perfume.

Not TSA but the land border, they detected nuclear material. It was because another passenger in my car had some heart surgery or something where they used radioactive material, and apparently it could still be detected. Border patrol pretty much knew what it was but had to check anyway.

When the Andrew Garfield Spiderman's first came out they did some amazing merch for them.My Stepdad is a HUGE Spidey fan, so I picked him up the corniest Spiderman film merch when in the US, one of those being like a whirling cement truck thing? It was a big tonka sized thing and the only bag it would fit in was my carry-on. They stopped me and said "Is that a spiderman toy?" and I took it out and showed them. They said it was the best thing they'd seen all day.

Not TSA but at a land border crossing once they pulled us aside because they thought my partner was Trafficking me?!?!? We were the same age, same race (so racism wasn’t a factor,) and we were both dressed fairly nice (coming back from a wedding) with no obvious signs of like… distress? [Illegal substances]? Gunpoint? Nothing. They pulled us aside and grilled him on all of our relationship things like where we met and how old I am and my mom’s middle name and…?!?!??? Trying to trio him up. Then the guard hit on me?!?!?! Weeeeirdest experience.

Got pulled to the side at Fort Myers airport. One TSA guy with gloves, two TSA guys standing right behind me. Officer says, is there anything you want to tell me before I open this bag?I am horribly confused. Wrapped right on top between a few t-shirts is an large Avocado.TSA guy starts laughing. I love Avocados, my 76 yo father has a tree in his yard... he slipped one in my bag before leaving. Apparently it doesn't look the best going through the x-ray machine, they thought it may be a home-made bomb or grenade.

Tampon showed up on the body scan thingy and I had to have my crotch patted down

My friend worked for the TSA. I was at my local airport and saw him while on line. I waved and he looked over. He says something to another agent and when I get to front of the line I get pulled over for extra searching. I never talked to that guy again

Arranging my two laptops and a tablet after taking them out of my bag for faster / easier scanning.I got yelled at and detained because I have Pre-Check.It took demanding for the scanning agent to join the conversation before I was allowed to leave.Had I left them all in the bag, I would have gotten stopped for secondary screening.The TSA is so damn frustrating. They serve no useful purpose except to provide security theater. They miss well over 90% of what they are tested against.

I have bad knees and occasionally bring a cane with me when I travel. I have one called a hurry-cane, basically a full-size cane that folds into three for easy packing. TSA requires me to still walk through w/o the cane if possible, so I folded it up and laid it on my checked luggage for the x-ray. This obviously new TSA agent has me pulled aside to wait for a supervisor because he said that he is familiar with it and it was a kind of weapon that his character uses in a video game. Was convinced I was trying to hide it as a cane, but that I was openly carrying a Chinese martial arts weapon. Took all of two seconds once the supervisor connected the cane to make the kid realize he was wrong.

But had me chuckling. On another trip at the same airport, I was pulled aside because they said the x-ray showed something suspicious in my carry-on. Emptied the whole bag, opened all zippers and checked all pockets, patted down each pocket, checked seams for hidden pockets, etc. then had me repack everything. Not a word was said to me about what they thought they saw. On the return trip, at the other airport, pulled over by TSA for exact same reason. Found nothing again. Haven't used that carry-on since. I'm guessing it's just something weird looking in the frame but isn't worth the hassle.

Pulled me aside after my backpack went through the scanner. I was just sitting there while they searched every pocket four times, running it back through the scanner in between each one. Every time they didn’t find anything they’d bring more people over.At that point I was starting to get nervous and asked what they were looking for. Guy number 5 searching my bag looks at me and says super accusingly, “we’re looking for the butterfly knife you have hidden in there,” to which I just laughed since butterfly knives are for edgy 14 year olds. I insisted I didn’t have one, they didn’t believe me.Eventually they found the “knife” it was an old mini-stapler that I had forgotten in there from when I was in school. They seemed embarrassed enough that I just left before they could come up with an excuse to take it out on me.

My friend spent most of a day being checked out/questioned because he has the same first, middle, and last name (all common American names) of a guy who allegedly went to the Middle East to join ISIS.

I'm 6'4", broad shouldered, and bald.I don't even know who is doing the stopping, because I don't give a s**t at this point, but I have never successfully made it through an airport without being pulled aside to have my s**t searched through, even when all I pack is clothes. I bake in the extra 30 minutes into any flight itinerary I have for this exact reason.

Last name is AHMED

I had a razor in my bag. Like old school razor with a two sided blade deal. They made me take the blade out... But didn't care about the 50 pack of blades that was right there

A company I did some contract work for in a different state was giving away a free monitor arm. I was stoked, put it in my bag, and didn’t think anything of it. I later moved it to my carry-on, and as I was going through security, TSA pulled me aside saying, “uhh, we need to look in your bag.” I thought that was weird, but whatever.I happened to get a glance at the X-ray that came up, and I knew the F-up right away. The monitor arm contorted in a way that the scan looked like a small rifle.I chuckled a bit and explained to the agent what it was. When the TSA lady saw it she had the biggest sigh of relief (I’m lucky she was a good sport about it). I wanted to take a photo of the X-ray, but she said I wasn’t allowed to :(

Actually pre-TSA days. Had a s***ty laptop that had a dead battery so I just plugged it in when I used it. Whatever. Security didn't believe it was a laptop. Told me I had to turn it on to prove it. Of course the battery was dead. Had to search for a power outlet. Sitting on the floor booting my s**t laptop while security hovers over me.

Got held back for 20 mins, on the depart and return, because I had magic decks in my bag. It apparently sets off something like crazy, they had to swab between EVERY single card for multiple 100 card decks. I check them now when I can.

My then-two month old was flagged by TSA in 2003. They took one look and realized the only bomb was in his diaper. The same season, his grandfather was subject to additional screening. They had the exact same Irish name: first, middle, and last. I surmised that there might have been an IRA person on an interpol list or something with the same name.

There was a rock in one of my army bags leaving Hawaii.

I had a brand new, unopened bag of seasoned salt that I bought in Hawaii. They made me open it so they could make sure it wasn’t [illegal substances]. Also, I have big curly hair and they always stop me to pat my head down.

Random check when… i was the only person in line

I had a ceramic cat ring holder that was part of my sister’s Christmas present. I’m flying from a state where weed is legal so I guess it looked like a pipe in the x-ray? Dude laughed when he pulled it out.