35 Conspiracy Theories People Feel Must Be True
These may make you think.
Published 3 years ago in Funny
Conspiracy theories are abound in today's day and age. What with nigh-unlimited access to information and the ability for like minds to converge on remote sections of the internet, it's inevitable that people start putting the pieces together on conspiracies -- wacky, true, or utterly outlandish. Down below are 35 conspiracy theories people can't prove but they feel must be true.
4
For the record, serious answer. But, there’s this soup place at our local mall that’s been there for three years now. I’ve never seen anyone order anything from there, and I rarely see anyone at the register. When our mall was closed due to COVID lockdown/quarantine, several locally owned stores shut down, and a few places in the food court. Last time I was there was for my birthday in August, and the soup place is still there. My mom and I have an array of theories about what it could be, ranging from money laundering to a front for drugs, but I cannot believe that place is legitimate.5
This might not be a groundbreaking hot take, but i think that applying for disability status/benefits is intentionally made to be a convoluted mess of bureaucratic jargon and endless hoops to jump through SOLELY so that disabled people don’t take advantage of them, either because they give up trying to navigate an intentionally confusing system, or because they make a mistake along the way, and the process gets f***ed up. I’m really lucky I had my mom helping me with a lot of the paperwork because otherwise I would never be able to get the supports I need in post secondary. It’s like someone purposefully designed the process to be as unobtainable, messy, and overwhelmingly complex for a disabled person as they possibly could.13
The conspiracy that created the term "conspiracy theory". Think back to the 30s, 40s, 50s. There were stories of the black cars showing up and making people that start finding out too much "disappear". Enter the 60s and 70s. Mass media starts growing at a massive rate. A rate at which the government realizes that they cannot ever fully control. Their genius solution is to open the floodgates of crazy. Push a bunch of conspiracy theories into the populace that makes real conspiracy reports be ignored as just "tinfoil hat crazy". Label ALL reports as conspiracy theory. This over time creates a societal misunderstanding in the form of the term "conspiracy theory" becoming equated with "crazy". An example of this is I believe that there really aren't many people that truly believe the earth is flat. There are just some entities planted that push it as a "theory". This then becomes one of the main examples of "all conspiracy theorists are not to be taken seriously".15
Reagan was diagnosed with Alzheimer's when he was still in office and his advisers told him to write a letter to the American people to be released later after it got too bad to hide. When his condition went public in 1994, they released the letter and it was almost perfect handwriting, spelling, and grammar. Six months later he couldn't carry on a conversation. I'm convinced he didn't progress that fast in 1994 and that the entire thing was constructed over the years to look like he was mentally competent while he was president.17
Dollar slice pizza places. This may not make sense to people who don't live in New York City. We have these great places that sell a plain slice of pizza (cheese only) for $1.00. I can't believe they make rent and payroll on volume with $1.00/slice and the going rent rates. This has to be some sort of money laundering scam, but one where no one cares because you get a slice of pizza for a dollar. Might not be the best pizza, but damn, a dollar slice. I'll always stop in if I'm passing one on the street. This just can't be economically feasible and something else is going on.22
Everyone’s going heavy with theirs but I have one that’s less serious. Baby wipe containers are purposely made so that you always pull 2-3 wipes out at a time and therefore need to buy more often. It’s definitely something I can see Big Wipe engaging in to get just a few more containers out of us each year!