Bloodrayne

The Bloodrayne games come from a simpler timer. A time when you could get millions of dollars to develop a game based on a pitch that just reads “Hot redhead vampire leather lady makes me horny.”https://midwestfilmjournal.com/2021/04/21/game-on-bloodrayne/ The series eventually became popular enough to spawn a movie, but its appeal is just as hollow as the games it is based on. Starring Kristanna Loken, the snooze-worthy plot and boring fights will make you feel like you’re watching somebody’s bad parody of the Underworld movies.

Assassin’s Creed

Did Michael Fassbender really think this film series was going to take off or was he just rounding out his mission to star in every genre franchise that comes along? Either way, this movie ended up being almost as mixed as the game franchise it was based on.

For a movie about killing dudes, this film is surprisingly slow and boring. And when you finally get some action, there is so much bad CGI that you might be surprised to remember that this is a movie and not one of the games!

Super Mario Bros.

Sometimes, movie adaptations of video games fail because they tried too hard to emulate the game's essence. However, this is not the case with Super Mario Bros., which is a Mario movie only in name.

Many of the film's characters are completely unrecognizable, including Bowser and his Goombas. And the attempt to add extended Mushroom Kingdom mythology falls completely flat. Watch just a few minutes of this movie and you’ll see why it nearly turned Bob Hoskins and John Leguizamo into alcoholics!

Doom

Doom is something of a paradox when it comes to its film adaptations. On one hand, a movie about running and gunning down scary aliens seems like it would be a good film. But just watching a lone character kill monsters would get boring after a while.

That’s why this movie adds in some crappy extra plot as an excuse to bring in other characters, including one played by Dwayne Johnson. While he and Karl Urban give decent performances, the plot is boring and the effects will make you yawn.

And if you make it to the first-person sequence, you can actually feel your soul cringing right out of your body.

Prince of Persia: Sands of Time

Even rich Hollywood actors have to take crappy jobs every once in a while when they need the money. At least, that’s our speculation as to why Jake Gyllenhaal ended up headlining the abominable Prince of Persia: Sands of Time adaptation.

While the franchise was revolutionary back in the day and compared to some of the real stinkers on this list, the whole film feels like a patched-up version of Indiana Jones meets The Mummy.

Silent Hill

You’d think Silent Hill would make for a perfect horror movie. After all, the Silent Hill games jammed as many horror movie tropes into every game as they could.

If you just want a horror movie that looks good, this film might do. But the characters are stiff and come complete with inane dialogue that has absolutely zero charm. Plus, this film runs so long that you’d be better off just playing the damn games again!

Street Fighter

Fans of guilty pleasures may unironically enjoy the live-action Street Fighter movie. But there are better pleasures (guilty and otherwise) to be found out there in movieland.

Jean-Claude Van Damme gives the kind of performance that can only come from constant cocaine abuse on set. Most of the characters are practically unrecognizeable, and main ones like Ryu are sidelined in favor of Guile.

Finally, as the last film of the great Raul Julia, watching this flick is bittersweet in all the worst ways.

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation

The original Mortal Kombat movie was unexpectedly great. It had just the right amount of campiness, fun characters, and engaging fights. And, of course, a killer song.

Yet its sequel Mortal Kombat: Annihilation was worse in every possible way. The characters were terrible, the special effects awful, and with boring fight scenes, you're better off staring at the wall. You’ll be rooting for your own fatality by the time the credits are rolling.

Alone in the Dark

As both a horror film and video game adaptation, Alone in the Dark fails in both categories. But it does occupy a sad place in film history.

In retrospect, this was the movie where Christian Slater, once a major Hollywood leading man, resigned himself to nothing but crappy schlock movies. When your costar is future Sharknado star Tara Reid, then the film’s eventual 1% on Rotten Tomatoes shouldn’t come as a surprise.

DOA: Dead or Alive

The Dead or Alive franchise took us all by surprise. What looked like a dumb and exploitative game series about girls and bouncing boobs ended up being an unexpectedly fun fighting series (especially the second game).

However, the movie adaptation of this franchise fails to be a fun throwback movie or a passable martial arts movie. And the whole thing looks like something they used to show on USA Up All Night, making viewers wonder where the hell that $30 million budget actually went!

Gamer

Gamer is another movie not based on a video game. But given the title, it’s safe to conclude who this movie was made for.

The general plot is about gamers who have the ability to remote control actual human beings in a kind of first-person shooter. Sadly, this movie is a failure on all fronts. It has nothing interesting to say about games, players, or even the influence of online communities and violence. And all of the “action” is completely forgettable.

Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li

This Chun-Li spinoff movie is less a sequel to the original Street Fighter movie and more of an extended advertisement for Street Fighter IV. Amazingly, it fails on both fronts!

As the lead, the woefully miscast Kristin Kreuk brings none of the charm of a coked-up Jean-Claud Van Damme. And while the original movie was a waste of an ensemble, a few minutes of this will make you long for more characters.

Ultimately, the worst thing we can say about this film is that it will make you wish you were watching the first movie. At that point, you might as well just go to bed, or fold your laundry, anything useful.

The Wizard

Unlike most of the movies on this list, The Wizard wasn’t based on a single video game. Nonetheless, this may be the most notoriously bad movie ever made for gamers.

You know how everyone only remembers the cringe moment where the Power Glove is described as “so bad?” That’s because nothing else is memorable about this film. It serves as a transparent ad for both Nintendo and Universal Studios with no real substance. And the central plot of our hero having serious PTSD is a real downer in a movie otherwise designed to make kids go buy video games.

Wing Commander

The Wing Commander games always felt cinematic. Especially when the third and fourth games introduced FMV sequences starring major actors like Mark Hamill and Malcolm McDowell.

Creating a Wing Commander movie, then, seemed like a no-brainer. But instead of Mark Hamill, we get a bland performance from Freddie Prinze Jr. that even costar Matthew Lillard can’t salvage. To top things off, the movie changed so much in terms of characters, designs, and plots that Wing Commander diehards could barely recognize their favorite franchise.

Double Dragon

On paper, it’s tough to mess up a Double Dragon movie. After all, the paper-thin plot of the games (two brothers rescue a girl from evil gangsters) already sounds like something out of an ‘80s B-movie.

However, the movie needlessly transforms the setting into a post-apocalyptic one. And the only recognizable actors (Alyssa Milano and Robert Patrick) turn in performances too bad to even be funny. Finally, the movie is filled with needless special effects that have aged like garbage.